Thinking...

Funny story--> I checked the scale again (I am trying to break a habit. I used to weigh myself everyday sometimes a few times a day). I stepped on the scale, squealed and exclaimed "I LOVE Tony!" My husband is gonna get jealous. LOL I don't want to stop progressing. I have been working so hard the last 10 weeks. Tony's plan has woken up my metabolism. I can also see and feel a HUGE difference in my muscles. I feel skinnier. No one would ever call me skinny right now, but I feel good. :)

I've been thinking... I have been thinking about maybe doing a figure competition. I know its not easy. I know there is a lot of work involved. I know there is a lot to go through after the competition as well. I also realize that my support base here in the "real world" will be next to nothing. My work situation is making it difficult enough to try and lose fat. I'm not counting on management being supportive or flexible in any way. Hubby doesn't want me to look like a man with a nasty tan. *sigh* My mom has the same opinion. On one hand I think I should make progress and see how things go. On the other hand I just want to do it and tell everyone else to stick it. For so long I have not been confident, happy, healthy or strong. At one moment in my life I was. I remember that feeling and I want it back. I want that version of me back. Doing a competition isn't necessarily the answer. Its just one more thing I'd like to try. It would give me more reason to push myself and see just what this body is capable of. I've been afraid of it for so long.

For now I am just thinking. I've let other people talk me out of things for so long.