Sunday, December 7, 2008

Ahhh Patience

I never have claimed (nor will I ever claim- most likely) that patience is one of my strong points. I can never accomplish what I want fast enough. I want bigger muscles now. Lots less fat now. Better cardio conditioning now. Oh and most of all- I want the stomach flu gone- NOW! Its best not to RUSH right back into regular food- so I am finding. I guess it wasn't as gone as I thought. :( I thought I would "ease" back into my meals by doing oatmeal and protein powder for breakfast. Eggwhites just didn't sound too cool this morning but I wanted to get some protein in me. Errr.... yeah didn't stay long, just sayin'.... :(

I keep attracting things into my life to deter my progress. Something is going on subconsciously and I need to fight it. Back in September it was abdominal distress that turned out to be an ulcer followed up with food poisoning- really? Seriously. Can a girl get a break? Not so much. Following that there was a blowout with a team on tracker that left me stunned, sad and unmotivated. After the cracker-fest with the intestinal issues I was a carb fiend again. Add some money issues and other stresses and wah-lah back to being chunky monkey. Fast forward and I end up at a comp in KY and my motivation is kick started like no other! I am excited and ready to tackle the world. So... here comes the world to hit me in the face repeatedly to see if it can knock me down. First week with my new trainer- some hellacious sinus infection and bronchial spasms. I make it through that mostly. Week two- My bosses throw some serious monkey wrenches into my schedule and I freak out about going to workout in public. Week 3 of my new program I am *ON FIRE*. THEN... stomach flu. REALLY??? Come on now. This is ridiculous. Its almost as if my body wants to stay fat. Its gotten comfy. My mind, however, is done with this nonsense. I am still feeling a little woozy and my stomach has decided to let me know that its not having any of this first meal. *damn* I want to work out. I want to eat on plan. I was making great progress this week. I was seeing results and I am not going to undo them.

I need some positive saying or something to create a safe environment for my body. I have to convince myself that it is okay to lose the fat and be strong. I can't believe I have had so many issues in this short amount of time. NOT COOL at all. I guess this is part of life and the process. I have to be patient and loving with my body. I have hated it for much of the last 8 years. So... I am off to think of some nice things. My body must heal up and get ready for the major changes. Its gonna happen. I'm going to make a major transformation.


Kelly Olexa said...

Hey girl, I can so relate to your medical issues, TRUST ME!! And I could give you myriad great affirmations to start chanting to yourself - if you want to email me do so at

Just remember, you have everything you need INSIDE YOU to do WHATEVER YOU SET YOUR MIND TO. What you think about you bring about. If it's meant to be, it's up to me. Thoughts become things. Make it happen.

I'm here for you!


Marissa said...

Hey! Keep your eyes on the prize. I know how you feel. I want it all now too! Keep a pic of your inspiration and that trophy you and I will have come April! :) If you need to vent you can always shoot me an email too!