Sunday, January 4, 2009

Importance of Preparation....

I blew it. Yup. I have already fallen on my face. Its okay, I'm back on track, but it still frustrates me. The last two days at work have been hellacious. Friday I didn't even get a 5 minute break. I snarfed on some chicken while getting stuff for a customer, but I had planned for a full lunch to grab a salad since I was out of lettuce and stuff. I also didn't have any protein powder or bars stashed in my locker. While I am not supposed to have any carbs other than veggies and fruits, I'm sure going for 8 damn hours without eating is worse. :( I have now put a bottle of protein powder in my locker and I have some RTDs back there, too. (I was out of that as well). Friday was horrible. I even got yelled at while eating my chicken! I took less than 3 minutes to inhale it and I was still working in the back. What the hell? Saturday they almost skipped me but I pretty much told them they can stick it. I didn't ask to go to lunch I just told them I was going. THE END. They looked at me with big eyes and said, "ok". So I did good with lunch, but I didn't get my meal in before dinner and I was starving. I ate my chicken and veggies but I was still hungry. I *wanted* dairy. I wanted anything like ice cream or chai. I caved. I *could* have made a protein shake and at worst used milk, but nope. I had to have the real thing. :( I'm so mad at myself, but I am moving on. Today is a new day. I can't undo it. I can only work harder.

Today is prep day. I am cooking and packing up meals for the week. NO EXCUSES. It sucks to fight with the management- they can really make things hard, but I am standing my ground. I have to. I am 13 weeks out and to be honest I just don't think it going to happen. My weight keeps yo-yoing. :( Before yesterday, my weight has been up and down and all around. It keeps coming back to the starting point and its ticking me off. Its always up after rest days (or the day after that). I know the last few days have been screwy and I am back down a pound, but 2 weeks of this carb cycling and I only 1 lb less? Grrr. I am going to push harder in my cardio. I'll figure out how to get over the fatigue. Hopefully my neck and shoulders will stop hurting soon. This is getting old. I am going to keep working hard. Hopefully, even if I don't make my current goal show, the prep for whatever show I aim for next won't be too crazy. I can't wait to get to my maintenance weight. How nice will that be.... I'm dreaming of that moment and some time in Aruba. :)

I'm cleaning and preparing. I'm getting my workouts in early so I can't be sidetracked by anything. Being tired is a state of mind.

Off I go!


erin21 said...

prep is important. you will be fine. like you said, you hopped right back on the wagon. and at least you didn't blow it and cheat the whole day. always could be worse. be positive, chick.

Lisa said...

I'm assuming you work in retail. I worked in retail years ago and I know how hard it is to get regular breaks. I think you did the best you could under the circumstances. Management certainly can be difficult at best to work around. Don't beat yourself up to badly over it. You got back on the wagon quickly. You are going to do great in whatever show you do.